Valentines day – should I understand this now?

I CAN be romantic!

I CAN be romantic!

So after many years of being lonely and single, spending my valentines day drinking copious amounts of alcohol with my best friend, I am now finding myself at my second real valentines day. In a real relationship, with a real boy and approaching an extremely real dilemma. I still do not understand Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day, the day where social media is swamped with sickening messages of love, engagements are at the top of the agenda and you can’t just pop out for a bite to eat without having to sign up to a £45 3 course menu (at least you may get a glass of cheap Prosecco thrown in, every cloud and all that.)

It’s not that I do not love my other half, he is amazing,  I want to spend the rest of my life with him however I want to spend the rest of my life making him feel special. Not just one day a year.

I don’t know if I am alone in this, it feels it. This weekend we popped to the nearest shopping centre to pick up a few bits I needed and I left with a feeling that if I ever saw another heart shaped chocolate gift again, it would be far too soon.

Am I heartless?

I mean, it is fair to add that I have succumbed, I have bought a lovely gift for the boy and a nice card.  We discussed it and deep down, as superficial as it is, I know that part of the reason we agreed to buy a gift was so that when other people ask one of us what we received for Valentine’s Day, we have a genuine answer.

I don’t know, this is just a bit of a babble, I just have a mass of feelings towards Valentine’s Day and I cannot figure them all out!

I will be giving a present on Valentine’s Day but trust me when I say it will not be heart shaped or adorned in glittery, tacky roses.

Am I the only one that feels like this?

Charlie x

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